Always been your girl

I was browsing over the songs of the artists that I like I came across one of Heather Headley’s songs that I was able to relate on. Once again I found myself a song that was telling a story about me. The title of the song is Always been your girl. As I listened to it over and over I was struck with the emotion that it showed.

The girl in the song was already hurt and was cheated on by the she loved, yet still she prefers to stay by his side. The guy was already letting her go because of his new girl. Yet this did not bother her. She insisted that she’s the right one for him and that the new girl is just a passing face because that’s what her heart tells her so. She believes that she’s the one who owns his heart and that what the boy has with his new girl is nothing but lust. She was a martyr to love him still in spite of everything that he’s done to her and the pain he has put on her.

By the way her lyrics are written I could tell that she knows a lot about the girl and that the girl has a lower status than her. The girl was nothing compared to her. She was more of a good catch than the new girl. But even if this was the case he was saying goodbye in-exchange of the new girl.

At some point I was in the shoes of that girl in the song who was pushing for her love. If you read my other blogs entitled Confessions of a Broken Heart and Is there really nothing to be jealous about her, there you would see my desperation to hold on to the person I love.

I felt that pain too. He left me for a girl who was not among us. It hurts and yet still I love him. And I still believe that it’s me who’s the right one for him. It’s me that he needs and that for now he just wants to have fun and I’m letting him have that. Foolish for me to think this way I know. But I feel it deep down inside my heart telling me that he loves me still and that he will come back to me because it is I whom he also loves. It’s just that he’s still young, we’re still young so I should let him explore on his own for now.

It’s been quite sometime now and I know that he’s regretting what he’s done for every once in a while he checks up on me. He tells me his troubles, he tells me everything. Though sometimes I wish that I don’t get to hear them because they’re breaking my heart, for he’s telling me stuff that I don’t want to know. But he doesn’t know this and I just let him be. I know someday there will be us again, which is why for now I’m trying to be strong to make it to that day.